Thursday, November 10, 2016

"What are your kids?"

I am not sure if there is a more flattering or more offensive question on this earth. I have had people ask me if I am my children's nanny before. I think I missed the memo on marrying someone that looks like your brother and procreating with them. Because, ew. Plus, I never really have been a fan of see-through babies. You know, the overly white ones where you can see their veins in their eyebrow? I like my babies a little more toasty. I like to think I am more evolved.

I digress. I have typed words, erased words, re-typed the same words, and then deleted some more. One step forward and two steps backwards. Much like what I believe is the state of our country at this time. As the election played out, my anxiety continually expanded in my chest. As someone that considers themselves an independent voter, the socially liberal, fiscally conservative, much like many other millennials, I am utterly appalled that a country that has come so far for racial equalities, same-sex equalities, and being a country where others looked to turn when their country failed them. Not only can I not fathom that the man we will now be asked to call our president has bankrupt his own many business ventures (steaks, airline, travel agency, vodka, mortgage company, a university, and so on) but our country elected a man that undermined a well-educated man because his parents were from Mexico making him unqualified for the degree and certification that he earned, mocked a disabled reporter, insulted a soldiers family, and made numerous statements about women being dogs, doing whatever he says because he is "famous," and the famous grabbing them by the cat. We have literally elected a man that knows absolutely nothing about being a president let alone anything about holding any political position. You guys, I can't.

On Tuesday evening I sat on my couch thinking about women in Germany, Poland, France, and many other places throughout Europe during the WWII era. Were the interracial relationships then? Probably not many. But what if there were? Would the non-Jewish mother whom married a Jewish man, had children with him, sit and wonder if her husband, the love of her life, and children, whom she would die for, would be taken and put into concentration camps or killed? Did she have to hide in the walls of homes for months because she was fearful that someone would come for her children and husband and leave her behind? We literally just elected a modern-era individual that hates people because of their ethnicity. What in the ever loving hell, America?

Someone wrote to me and said "I voted for him because it was best for my family at this time." Well, that is just fabulous for you, you selfish brat. It is also in my best interest, financially, to vote for a Republican candidate. But you know why I don't? Because I think of the women that have been raped and became pregnant by their rapist and the fear they have when people start saying that a woman should not be able to terminate a pregnancy within a reasonable timeframe. I think about letting their body stretch and get sick and every time that baby moves, thinking about the time she was raped and experiencing that trauma all over again. I think about the mother with four children, pregnant with her fifth, and at 22 weeks experiencing such high blood pressure that she has to either terminate the pregnancy, or die, leaving four more children motherless because someone told her how she has to take care of her body and her health. I think about the single mothers that were left by the father of the child, or the mother that got out of a poor relationship to protect her child and herself, barely surviving, barely able to put food on the table, but needs help from the government so she can keep some food on the table and a roof of their head. But, my my, go ahead and vote for what is best for you, not what is best for our country.

I got to thinking, I am a small blue dot, living amongst a sea of red dots. I think I know two other people in my whole neighborhood that voted for Hillary Clinton. Also in this sea of red dots there are no interracial relationships. I know, shocking right? These are the people asking if I am my children's nanny and if my oldest was a "planned pregnancy." For the record, he was, I was married, so mind your P's and Q's, bitches. It just so happens this sea of red are mostly older parents. There is certainly a divide in parenting style for those that have had their children in their 30s and those that had their children in their 20s. But, that comparison is for another day. My first grader came home and said "my friends told me Hillary Clinton is a criminal." So, maybe she did some things wrong, maybe not, we probably won't ever know. But what we DO know is that racism, sexism, xenophobia, and misogyny are alive and well in this country, and our president elect embodies all of these traits. I am starting to believe that in this sea of red, no one has heard of the concept of white privilege. It is what it sounds like, but it is also so much more. It is the blindness that masks your thoughts when you ask a mother "what are your children?" They are kids, two boys and one girl, little humans, you know?

So I would just like to leave a message to you cute little elephants basking in your election glory: "look up what white privilege means and do some research about how it affects you. If you think it does not affect you, you are the definition. Keep treading in your inner circle of other privileged white friends that do not get that they are privileged. Be a non-inclusive person. If posting on social media about how you "won," just remember, you may have won, but many non-straight people, women, non-white people, lost. Pretty much everyone that is not a white, middle to upper class male, lost.

America, and more importantly, Donald Trump, please prove me wrong. Please prove to me that the leader of the free world is not the person that you have acted like. Prove to those that celebrated the win of Donald Trump (I am looking at you, Iran, China, and Russia) as a serious downfall of our country, prove them wrong. Prove my children wrong. I want to live in a country where my children start at the same start line as other white children, and right now I think I do, but do not push them back. Do not let our children see the hate that has spewed from your orange face and oddly-hued, bubblegum lips. And lastly, don't ask someone "what are your children?"

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